Boyfriends
by checkmate14
Summary: Or: Five Times Someone Thought John Was Sherlock's Boyfriend (And One Time They Didn't).
1. Chapter 1

_**Five Times Someone Thought John Was Sherlock's Boyfriend (And One Time They Didn't)**_

_I- Mycroft_

"Sherlock Holmes, put that damn violin down this instant!" Mycroft roared. After an hour of his little brother playing the same four bars of Bach over and over, he had eventually snapped.

Sherlock looked up, a smile playing on his lips as he paused for a second before finishing the final notes one last time. Mycroft scowled. "John, where's that tea I asked for?" Sherlock called out placing the instrument down by a window and finally turning to face his brother.

"John's at work, Sherlock." The older man said tiredly. "Has been for several hours by now, I'd think. You know, because he has a _job_? It's probably something that's worth looking in to."

"Boring." Sherlock said immediately. "Boring boring boring. Now, why don't you just tell me the details of the case so I can tell you I'm not taking it and we can both get on with what we'd rather be doing?"

Mycroft frowned. "You might be pleasantly surprised, Sherlock. It's at least a nine."

"Last time you told me it was a nine, it wasn't anything more than a four, so don't mind if I don't take you seriously." He picked up the gun that had come to find a home on the mantelpiece and began twirling it idly between his fingers. He took in the look on his brother's face before adding, "It's not loaded."

"Just take the case, please Sherlock. I know for a fact that you don't have anything on right now- you are just being childish. Like usual."

The front door clicked downstairs and Sherlock's eyes automatically flicked to the door of the flat. Mycroft didn't fail to notice the movement.

"Oh, isn't that _sweet_, Sherlock? You sit around and wait for him to come home." Mycroft taunted. Sherlock didn't respond, but instead span the gun around in a fraction of a second and, without aiming, shot the smiley face on the wall right between the eyes.

Mycroft jumped a little in his seat, and sighed. "Of _course_ it wasn't loaded."

There was a tense silence as John reached the top of the stairs and entered the flat. Unfortunately however, his entrance only increased the tension between the brothers, and after a minute or two, Mycroft placed his tea cup on the table and stood up.

"I'll leave you with your boyfriend, Sherlock." He said, glancing between the two men. "I'm sure you have a date to get ready for or something.

"Goodbye Mycroft." Sherlock said coolly, as at the same time, John protested heatedly, "I am _not_ Sherlock's boyfriend!"


	2. Chapter 2

**_Five Times Someone Thought John Was Sherlock's Boyfriend (And One Time They Didn't)_**

_II- Hospital_

In their line of work, it's a wonder that Sherlock and John don't end up in hospital more often. Or that's to say, it's a wonder that _John_ didn't end up in hospital more often as Sherlock sat there, moaning about how dull it was, having dodged the offending fist, blade and/or, in more than one case, bullet, without bothering to shout a warning. It got to the point when John no longer groggily asked, "Where am I?" upon waking from his near coma-inducing dose of anaesthesia, but "What happened this time?".

"Baseball bat to the head." Sherlock said as soon as John's eyes fluttered open. The army doctor groaned and slumped back into the pillows.

"Can I leave yet?"

Sherlock's eyes flicked between the nurses whispering in the corridor and back to John. "A few hours, I'd think. It wasn't too severe."

"Excellent, John, you're awake!" A nurse said cheerfully as she walked through the open door. Sherlock tried and failed to hold back an eye roll. "Now…" She said, looking down at the clipboard she held. "I think it's best to keep you in until later this afternoon, just to be sure, but it's unlikely that you will have to stay in overnight." She smiled, aiming for comforting and ending up somewhere around creepy.

"Is there anything I need to fill in? Forms or anything?" John asked, just as the nurse was leaving.

She turned back and shook her head. "Your boyfriend has done them all for you. You just rest Mr. Watson."

John flushed red instantly. "He's not my _bloody_ boyfriend!" He protested at her retreating back, but she didn't show any signs of having heard him. John glared at Sherlock. "Why does everyone keep thinking that we're dating?"

Sherlock shrugged.

When the time finally came for John to leave, after many hours of whining from Sherlock's part, he felt an irrational necessity to explain to the nurse that he did, in fact, have a girlfriend.

"Oh god, I'm so sorry, it's just, your friend… Sherlock, is it? He said you were partners and I just presumed…" The nurse blushed. "I'm really sorry."

John grimaced. Of course Sherlock said that they were partners. "That's okay. It wasn't your fault. My _work partner_ _and roommate_ fails to understand even the most basic of social conventions."


End file.
